Aku & I

aku sedih.. aku binggung.. aku hampa..aku kecewa..aku merana.. aku terseksa..aku menyeksa.. aku ketawa... aku gila.. aku membenci.. aku dibenci.. aku membenci kata-kata benci..aku hilang.. aku diam.. aku pergi..aku kembali.. aku mendusta..aku sengsara.. aku sunyi.. aku tidak dipeduli.. aku tidak diperlu..aku tidak menangis..aku merasa sendiri..aku kecil..aku menyesal..aku dikesali..aku ditinggal....aku tidak mengetahui.. aku tidak memberitahu... aku tidak diberitahu..aku bertanya.. aku disoal.. aku bersoal..aku keliru..

I hate.. I been hated.. I frustrated.. im lost.. I got bet..I lose.. I gone... Im numb..i suffer.. I fall...

Myself 1

Cake she.

You can call her Miss cayce,
But please pronounce it kc

She was born on April the tenth,
In a city called klang by then

She gets easily obsess in things,
One of them is chocolates and games

She is a social phobic,
That’s simply nervous in front of public

Even though she is not an affable type
But still she can apprise people’s right

Her words is so much caustic
When you get in her nerves is kinda pathetic

Don’t try to call her cute
Or even to call her astute

Life rules is quite simple and tight
When you love god everything’s gonna be alright

She really love when peoples entertain her
When you do that she will remember you forever

The reason that keep her breathing
Is family and friends that keep on loving

Please forgive her for past mistakes,
She’ll be thankful to end these days.

Write 4

Aku ilhamku


Aku memerhati di luar jendela,
Angin yang menghembus begitu nikmatnya

Aku menyusun kembali segala memori,
Kerana ianya tidak akan berulang lagi

Aku jatuh di lembah yang hina,
mengorak langkah untuk berdiri semula

Aku hinggap di pohon berduri,
Mencari-cari kelemahan diri

Aku menunggu hawa yang setia,
sanggup menerima diriku seadanya

Aku belajar untuk menghargai,
Teman yang benar sukar dicari

Aku tersentap melihat si dia,
Masih binggung dan terpinga-pinga

Aku mendaki gunung yang tinggi,
Mencari kehidupan yang belum pasti

Aku membaling segala duka,
Tidak terlintas untukku merana

Aku merakam detik-detik terakhir ini
kemudian bermula sebuah peristiwa menanti.

*bahasa ibunda pulak.. slalu english.. kali nie lain.. in malay wasnt that fun but still it was meaningful..

tiga tambah empat.

1. 7 CIRI LELAKI IDAMAN ANDA :

-family type.
-boleh amik hati my dad (berpelajaran dan beruwang)
-boleh amik hati my brother (islam yg baik)
-with looks.. haha. kawin skali je kan nak kena menghadap die sepanjang hidup..-my dad's words..
-full of surprises..(romantik and funny)-mcm edward cullen..
-bertanggung jawab.
-love me more than i could love him.. haha-its was my moms words..
(kesimpulannya aku sgt choosy.. haha... ada future andartu..)


2. 7 LELAKI YANG TIDAK PERNAH ANDA MINATI SEPANJANG HIDUP:

-pervert.
-berlagak pandai
-x dew keinginan utk memperbaiki diri
-menindas wanita.
-lemah dari segi mental dan fizikal
-pendirian x tetap..
-pentingkan diri sendiri.


3. 7 PERASAAN ANDA SEKIRANYA KELUAR DENGAN ORANG YANG DIMINATI... (skrg perasaan ak gak heartless tapi bolehlah pretend)

-Butterflies
-goffyness. aku mesti memalukan diri sendiri..
-x terckp..diam memanjang..
-pandang dier wt muka serius tapi bile dier x nampak senyum bkn main ag..haha
-asyik2 betulkan baju & tudung etc.
-awkwardness(definitely not myself)
-kegatalan increase.. haha..



4. 7 benda yang ingin anda beri kepada si dia :

-smile.
-cubitan.tamparan hebat.wawa.
-full attention
-sbnrnya ak x fall in love lagi jugak..


5. Tajuk Lagu Yang Akan Anda Nyanyikan Untuk Pasangan Anda:
-sore aku x sedap.. masa kareoke aku nyanyi lagu shanana by amy mastura.. (sbb tue jer senang)lagu tue jelah yg boleh.. haha..


6. Rakan Yang Anda Tag Dan Mahu Mereka Buat 7 PERIHAL Ini
kawan aku sumer mcm da buat.. x yah tag sesapa..

Style me cow.

Hari raya


Hari raya haji lepas.. aku n family g one place around rawang.. ada buat majlis korban.. kena tolang masak etc. penat lah jugak untuk org yg x slalu buat kerja nie.. hehe.. anyway.. abg aku ditugaskan masak nasi daging.. so aku kena tolonglah.. like always.. kena perli buat kerja x betul.. what do you expect makcik?.. aku x byk makan garam lagi.. ofcourse x taw masak.. tapi depan dier aku senyum jelah.. x melawan eh.. even kat umah pun bibik aku yang masak.. bukan lah x taw langsung nak masak Cuma kalau suwuh pandai terus ofcourse take time kan?.. yang bapak aku plak menambah2 ‘ha tulah dah besar pun x reti buat kerja..nie ajar dier cukup2’....tapi bapak aku tukang arah jer.. aku yg buat selebihnya. kebengangan lah aku..



Muscle contraction .. masa chek tgh potong daging tue tetiba daging tue gerak2 .. aku pown dgn bataknya.. ‘daging tue geraklah’.. chek ‘ha ah lah..’ pastu chek tetiba lompat dr tempat potong daging.. Pastu abglong.. datang dier explain .. nie muscle contraction.. sbb ada lagi udara dlm nye.. yalah baru kena sembelih.. masih fresh lagi… aku pown ‘oooh’ abg aku kan doctor.. agaknye dier ada blaja kowt.. hihi.. Untuk mengurangkan rasa kebangann aku cucilah mata.. ehehe.. kat sana ada byk lelaki2 yg membantu operasi korban.. gaga.. dierorg nie probably perkerja saba consultant atau budak2 asrama atau sedara mara etc...




Sebelum korban

Anyway another story.. ina minum air… die buat muka pelik after minum.. but semua org buat x endah jer.. sbb kadang2 ina mmg suka wat muka cam tue.hehe. pastue abglong lak yg minum.. dgn mukanya terasa disgust by it ‘yuks air apa nie..’.. kita org pun cam ‘ha asal?.. air apa?..’ g lah tengok dkt tempat buat air tue.. rupa2nya.. letak sabun basuh kereta.. hadoi.. patutlah rasa pelik.. (nasib baikla aku x terminum).. warna botol tue kaler oren.. budak2 asrama tue ingat air oren.. tapi sebenarnya ada sticker besar dpn tue gambar kereta.. dier org main bantai jer buat.. and ada tukang imam pun satu hal .. g letak dkt dgn tempat makanan tue asal?..haha.. we all to blame.. adik and abang aku jadi mangsa keadaan..kesian..



After korban

Write 2

Meditation

Smell a nice green grass
Feeling, reborn, refresh and realize

Hear my girls talk at night,
Laugh a lot when they fight

After the dark secret reveal
Seeing their faces makes me ill

Feeling a bit guilty baby
Even when I was lonely

Talk to myself and I still got fear
Have some revenge killing my ear

Hard to forget but I’ll forgive
Just need some time to save this gift


*gambar kat taman rakyat .. but not the same day im writing this..

Story the mory..

I wrote this after get home from ‘AC’ at Taman Rakyat while hanging out with my friends izzah,fiza, nut, mira and mira’s sister (sori lupa nama).. I just thought of writing this. The title is meditation because I am meditating on myself. .. and that’s how the story goes..

Write 1

Inside me.

My brain and my heart are married couple
And a young healthy baby was born afterwards.

I talk with my heart at night,
But I talk with my brain in daily light.

A thing about me is that
I got a heart like an angle
But a brain likes a devil

So when the heart stops to talk
The brain will make his moves

But I got confuse when they fight
Because I don’t know who to choose and who were right

Since the day they say I do, they can’t never be separated
Even when they were argue , they will make it through.

This is my 1st ever lyric, poem whatever you called it.. and its truly based on me.. What’s going on 'inside me'. I can be an awesome friend but an evil enemy.. so don’t mess with me baby.. gaga.. aku tahu aku syok sendiri..heeh..

X dew lagu lagi tapi ada true story time sekolah dulu..;)

After the get over thingy. I just got a new hobby. First I ask fiza to read it but she doesn’t gave any good response so then I ask azleen to read it and she enjoying it.. She said that my words were meaningful. At the bus waiting to come home I ask izzah to read it too.. she told me I could make it a song lyric . after that I feel confident to just write.. eventhough is not that good.. Special thanks to those people who gave me the guts.. but actually there is one guy and a lady that give me an inspiration to write this so called lyric or maybe a poem. They been in this journey for a long time.. I kind of follow their idea but they don’t know it.. anyway if you like it or want to know more just let me know..;)

Lucky

*ok yg nie agak serious and boleh mendatangkan spakulasi dll. so paham2 jelah no such lawak in it.. tapi kalau korang rase lawak suka hatilah… but aku rasa kau gila.. hehe.. and I write this based on what I see and what thought with my surrounding (media massa and etc.).. but I never had intention of hurting anyone but if I did ‘sape makan cili dia akan terasa kepedasannya’..

Lucky.. yes tajuk hari ini lucky… and lagunya Britney Spears - Lucky


Lucky atau bertuah dlm b.melayu.. well everyone had their own .. but for me .. I think I got mine surprisingly.. lucky and love got a lot in common.. Both start with the letter L and if we feel lucky we must love it right?.. at a piece of mind right now I don’t feel so much in luckiness’ but I wasn’t in a bad situation either.. feeling a bit empty inside.. just like a normal boring day.. seeing others being so much in lucky hurts me.. but I still fell relieved when thinking there is someone that wasn’t as lucky as I am.. This is what human usually do .. they NEVER satisfied in their life.. well some of them do . Only the religious type person doesn’t..and as for others they are born to feel selfish as when they don’t get what they want.. they are like the hungry greedy leopard searching for an elephant to eat while in his mouth has a horse in it.. and of course lust has to do with it.

The ‘upper class’ mind master doing this.they have the urge to look their very best to be recognized and impress by others .. Fab and fame is what they easily get addicted with.. they don’t care about what’s others feels as long as they got what they want..im not saying fab and fame is not good thing.. it will good if we know the right way..it wasn’t surprisingly to see if they are those who think about themselves when at the moment they should really thinks about other.. but maybe not all of them do.. they have their good times and bad times too..at certain situation yes, we need to be selfish but ONLY depend on a certain situation. For instant..if people drag us doing bad things then we must be selfish or things get out of hand which we badly cant handle it then it will be wise to be selfish because if we cant handle our self why bother about others? It will make things worse..

But usually true friend’s doesnt care about how much their problems burden them as long as they can help their friends.. Yes, true friends sacrifice themselves for others and of course true love also will do the same. Finding a true love or a true friends is like finding the world greatest pearl...like the novel ‘the pearl’ only more valuable than pearl. Yes, we need to keep our ‘pearl’ tightly as possible because is rarely happen and more valuable that we could ever imagine. And usually back to the ‘upper class’ mind they were too blind to see this. They rather making themselves look good then seeing others feeling good..well they’re losing some really precious worlds pearl..there is the other type of person who willing to help others in disguise of helping themselves.. Those are the hypocrite’s one. They will silently brag about how they help others in true intention to finding an excuse to help themselves. Those types are one that look so angelic when they are actually have a devil mind and they are hardly recognized to their innocent look. With the so called ’crocodile tears’ will do the trick?

They are quite the same like the ‘upper class’ mind because both of them are parasite but ‘upper class mind’ are more obvious in their selfishness. But there is nothing wrong with being mutualism or communalisms whereby either both benefit or one benefit and the others are not affected. in fact is the way of life.. we all need some helping hand at certain situation right?. It depends on our true intention in what we are doing. As long as we didn’t go too far, that’s will be just fine. But of course it is better handle everything by ourselves being so much in ‘berdikari’. If it doesn’t burden us too much. With that not only we are more mature , we don’t depend on people too much because people does got their own problems to handle with, let alone dealing ours, and when we can save yourself , it will be wise to help others that needed our help..

Write 3

He

Perhaps he is just my hallucination,
That’s always hunted me whole life.

He is the one that always hungry for how,
And hunt for every heckle.

He don’t humiliate, hidebound,
Horrifying, hastily or talking harshly.

He is not hideous, he is handsome,
hot and with a great height.

He is hilarious with his sense of
humor that can make me happy.

He is honest, humble and can
hide his actuate feelings.

He is huddle, who is good enough
to hang on, to hug and hold my hand.

He is hardworking throughout his
hardship in the hedge of life.

He knows how to take care
of our health and hygiene.

He can share hobby and a great habit,
that is also easy to handle and harmonious.

He is from a good hereditary that sensitive
of heritage and knows our history.

He can show his house which I can called home,
And hospitable that quite handy and helping.

He can give me a nice holiday on our
Honeymoon and someone I could have
and is always here for hours long.

He can give me hope and hear even though I am in a bad hurt,
He can guide me to heaven in the hell of world.

He is the one that I could call the holy hero,
My sweet honey and honorable husband.

*Okay korang mesti notice yg everything pun ada huruf H.. mmg saja buat.. well ini konon2 aku punya hyper perfect guy dlm imaginasi aku or so called lala land.. hehe..bertapalah aku ini choosy..walaubagaimanapun ada mesejlah disebaliknya.. kalu korang paham ler..;)

This is me.

Hi peeps .. as you may or may not know this is my 1st ever blog that I’m writing .. sorry for the grammatical error and I know tatabahasa saya pun lemah.. Anyway if you guys been wondering why mysterious wonderland? And y an another kc?.. does she has a twin or sumthing?hehe.. let me explain 1st ,it happen accidently while I’m trying to sign up.. the name just pop in my mind while I’m trying to sign up.. Mysterious?. I am mysterious right?.. most of the people hardly know me because I keep most of the things to myself and wonderland?.. I’m always in my lala land as pn sarah used to mention before. It also explain my world which is full of wonder.. An another kc?.. y is that?.. well because in this blog I will reveal some of my thoughts , true feelings and mostly my life which the normal kc wont do it.. “since I’m not the loud type person” if you know me you can actually spot the difference between me and me in the blog. Oh yeah don’t forget to read my latest post if I upload it later perhaps I talk about you?.. or you?.. or maybe all of you.. Okay that’s about all.. Thanks for wasting ur time reading my lousy blog appreciate it much.. And see you later alligator.. *ps for every post I’m gonna pick one song which match my current mood (it doesn’t based on lagu nie sedap or tidak .. I based on the lyric which seakan-akan nak sama dgn my mood) .. So song for this blog is = This Is Me by Demi lovato & Joe Jonas.